Ganbare Goemon! Karakuri Douchuu
20 May 2001 - Reflection by Spinner 8
Despite having Dragoon-X’s name plastered all over this patch, this translation was ALL me. :) Sit back kids, and let me tell you the long, sad story of the Goemon translation…
I was testing out Neo Demiforce’s translation of Goemon for donut, and I was surprised at just how COOL the game was, despite Demi saying stuff about how it was stupid and generic and stuff. And stupid and generic it is, but the game has some serious STYLE. Word. Anyway, Demi never actually finished the game (despite numerous translation sites saying otherwise, and Neo Demiforce’s site having no information whatsoever.. I only just confirmed its incompleteness after kueller finished his patch), and it looked easy enough, so I thought I’d finish it up real quick. Oh I almost forgot, I also started on it because Demi’s patch was only for the FFE dump of the rom. And that’s bad!! And so is the story of How It All Started. Those stories are never very good, are they?
Well! Things started out pretty good, I got the script dumped and sent off to Xeur (thank you Xeur!!!) to poke at. Jiji was very nice and worked on some title screen designs for me. I got the script back from Xeur and was very happy! And I got ready to put it all back in. That’s when I realized, this was a pretty big script. I’ve never inserted a script before. (The others I’ve done were typed in by hand.) This wouldn’t be TOO much of a problem, but I’m an idiot. Which makes this a big problem. Not to mention the fact that I didn’t know how the hell the pointers worked! Their being in between the actual text strings didn’t help matters any. So I figured, instead of spending way too much time trying to figure it all out, I’d just hand the project to someone else, so they could do all the bad stuff to it. And in one of the most monumental mistakes of my life, I gave it to kueller.
So ended my involvement with the project. I asked if he’d do it, and he said he’d only do it if it was released under the Dragoon-X name. I said I couldn’t care less about how it was released, as long as it WAS released. (I was still reeling from Xeur’s HUGE SD Splatterhouse guilt trip about taking so long to release it.) Anyway, it was all settled and stuff, and Neil_ was brought on to do all the graphics work, as can be seen in the pretty pictures. kueller didn’t even bother with the pointers, and just squeezed all the text into the space that was given, in typical kueller fashion. I haven’t thoroughly compared the script translation with the in-game work, but I’m pretty sure that most of the stuff was lost. Ah well who cares, sacrifices need to be made. It’s a shame though, there’s some really funny stuff in there.
Anyway, the patch was done and released, and everyone loved it for a couple days before it was forgotten, as usual. What I couldn’t stand, though, was that the “ODD” and “EVEN” text was taken out entirely from the gambling house. So you were moving this red underline around, without knowing what the hell you were betting on. Naturally this doesn’t matter much, but it still pissed me off. Lots of things piss me off. kueller’s excuse was that he couldn’t find it in the rom, so I took a look at the rom myself and found it immediately. What a bastard! :) His excuse after that was that it didn’t matter, and that everyone could figure it out for themselves anyways. I bitched some more, and he finally fixed it. A minor victory to say the least, considering the other things I’ve found that are wrong with the game. I’m listed in the Thanks part of the readme as a “ph33v1r15h m4d bugr3p0rt3r”. Word to that.
Yeah, so kueller’s little blurb in the readme was all wrong, and Demi never hacked this rom himself to work in NESticle, and I never quit the scene, and the game never “crashes” in NESticle, and I never “wanted” him to release it under the DX name. You heard it here first, kids! No punches pulled!